Today's post is an excerpt from our free ebook, The Charisma Checklist: 8 Tips To Be The Most Admired Person in Any Room. Click here to gain full access.
Identity ShiftYour behaviors are a reflection of your identity. Changing behavior means believing new things about who you are. If you know you’re a guy who really nails names and makes people feel good about themselves, and each action you perform is driven by that fundamental belief, then good sir, you’ve just faked it until you’ve maked(!) it.
In other words, it’s tough to stick to unnatural habits without changing who the guy is behind them. Here’s a great quote from a helpful blog by James Clear: “Most of the time we try to achieve results before proving to ourselves that we have the identity of the type of person we want to become. It should be the other way around.” To believe in a new identity, we have to prove it to ourselves. Make an identity shift so that you believe you are good at remembering first names. Not that it’s that hard, I mean you are really good at remembering names, right?
“A person’s name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language.” Dale Carnegie
AppsYep, there’s an app for that. Namerick uses techniques of the world’s best memory athletes to teach you to remember the first names of people in your network with strangely amusing limerick-type rhymes. Sounds weird, but apparently it works wonders.
If you still can’t seem to remember...On a personal note, I have a little technique to offer in case you still have issues and forget a name: just ask how it’s spelled. People spell their names differently, which means most will spell out their name for you, or if they find it strange that you asked, you’ve got just enough plausible deniability to keep them from being too suspicious. It’s a last ditch effort, but one that can save face in a few dire social situations.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:Jason Epstein is a nationally published and distinguished thought leader in charismatic behavior. He has written for numerous publications including Askmen.com, Brobible.com and MadeMan.com.